Tag Archive | "Body"

The Art of Body Language – Guidelines for Men on Dating

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Body language is very important in every aspect of our society. Especially when it comes to dating, body language is one of the most significant things to understanding whether or not you are on the right track.

Initially, how you act, how you sit or stand and how you say things are more important than what you say. Your body language says many things about you. If you want to attract any woman you fancy, you must pay attention to your body language. To be successful when you are going out on a date you should know some basic guidelines and rules.

The smile. Always keep a sweet smile on your face especially when meeting that woman of your dreams for the first time. Smile can make any woman feel comfortable and at ease. A genuine smile always works and lets everybody feel that you are friendly and harmless. You cannot go wrong with a smile.

Always keep eye contact. Do not attempt to stare at a woman’s chest, or even dare to look. Most men make that mistake and do not be one of them. Keep eye contact while having a conversation but do not overdo it for it may intimate her. Be natural and just maintain your eye contact for about 70 percent of the occasion to keep her comfortable. Maintaining eye contact may be difficult to do but it should be practiced.

Maintaining an upright posture can give a good impression. Women have a preference of men who have straight and proper postures. All those major film actors have good postures. Having a proper bearing conveys to women that you are healthy, strong and self-confident. It makes you look more attractive. Have a habit of having a proper posture not only to look good but to maintain healthy bones and muscles as well.

Always carry a confident personality. As they say, practice makes perfect. Confidence may not be a God-given gift but you can definitely learn it by practicing. Being confident can get you to places with women as well as with your career.

Light touches are fine during the course of the date. A slight pat on the woman’s hand is one way to create an immediate attraction. It can actually break the ice and make a woman feel at ease. The reaction you get may vary from one woman to the other so you should make sure that you aren’t being too aggressive. Some women may be ok with it while other women may not.

It is very important to pay attention to her. You are on a date with the woman of your dreams so focus your attention on her. It’s important that you are facing her when you are having a conversation. This is a mistake that many men make. Concentrate on everything she says. It pays to be a good listener. Many men have attention deficit and do not know that listening is one of the most important aspect in any relationship.

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Reading Body Language to Improve Dating Success

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Body language is everything and when you are dating it will serve you well to be able to read and understand a lot of the body language going on around you. Less than 10% of all communication is done verbally; the rest is done through body language. If you know some of the basic signs and signals that people generally make when they are attracted to someone, you will find that you have a lot of luck when you are dating.

One of the most obvious signs that someone is interested in you is eye contact. Men and women usually only make contact with people that they like or are interested in. This eye contact can last less than a second, or it can last an uncomfortably long time, especially in the case of women. Women who are attracted to men will often make eye contact, look away, and then look back and hold the gaze for up to ten long seconds.

Another body language cue that someone may be into you is if they mirror your movements. If you move your right hand, they will move their left hand in the same manner. If you are curious to see just how into you someone is, you can move your body intentionally to see if the person you are with will mirror your movements. Of course, not everyone does this so don’t be deterred if your date doesn’t mirror your every movement.

Another good indication that someone is into you is if they touch you when it is not necessary. These are just small touches, like a touch of the hand or the knee or even the shoulder. Generally people will not touch people that they do not like or that they are not attracted to, so if you are on a date with someone and they touch you, chances are that they are into you and you can make your move.

Men and women both have a tendency to play with their hair when they are attracted to someone. Women will often flick their hair back or push it behind their ears while men will run their hands through their hair or even stroke their facial hair. If you are with someone that you are attracted to and they seem to mess with their hair every time you look at them that is a great indication that they are into you as well!

Being able to read body language will come in very handy when you are dating. Even if you are not on an actual date you will be able to figure out what the people around you are thinking or feeling about you at work, in the club, or even in the grocery store. When you stop and watch the way people react to you, you’ll learn a lot more than if you listen to what they are saying. Dating can be a whole new experience when you look for telling body language.

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How to Tell if a Guy is Into You by Observing Their Body Language

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Deciphering body language is the best way to know whether a guy is interested in you or not.  And believe me …it is not difficult to understand. Just a few simple tips and you will definitely find out the truth. As it is , people say that it is difficult to hide love. This article gives you a step by step insight on the changed body language of the guy who likes you.

 Body tells it all. Yes observing body language is the most effective way of knowing whether a guy likes you or not. One cannot easily hide feeling of love and especially if he is in front of the person he likes or loves, so here is your chance to take a note of it and decide whether he like you or not, without wasting further time on tearing petals from the rose buds.  You have surely better ways to know that!

Face – reading the face is the best way to know whether a guy likes you. He is usually blushy, if he is shy type in your presence. A guy who is interested in you will always have a happy, cheerful face, especially when he is around you. Take notice of this carefully and you will get your answer soon.

Eyes – it will not be wrong to say that eyes say it all. His eyes will show you how much he missed you. His eyes will shine with your presence and will search for you in your absence. Whenever you are in a group, he will frequently look at you and pass a smile. This search of his eyes for you is indicative of his fondness towards you.

Smile- this is another aspect of body language that is quite revealing. Thought he guy will smile at others also but the smile that he gives to you is special, it is different. And if he is giving you this very special smile, it’s time lady that you understand that he likes you.

Hands – his hands will try to reach out for you. His will give a few touches, brush or a squeeze sometime, though not overdoing it.

When in a group, the guy who is interested in you will try and find the closest seat to you. In case he is unable to do so, he will surely sit diametrically opposite to you, so that he can see you. If the guy is shy type, he will sit at the corner but surely at a place from where he can see you interrupted. This is a definite sign of likeness towards you.

Also while walking with you side by side, he will brush a few times.

All these signs of body are indicative of his likeness towards you. It is indicative of the fact that he wants to see you again and again, wants to be close to you, is happy when you are around and there is a smile when he sees you. Well, these signs of body language will answer your questions truthfully.

                            

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Flirting – Body Language Secrets You Should Know

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Is the ability to flirt an inborn skill?. Flirting is a skill that can be mastered by anyone. All it takes is practice. There are a number of different approaches you can take.

The first thing you need to know is that flirting can be done by anyone. You don’t need to be drop dead gorgeous, athletic or super intelligent either. People will be attracted to the qualities that are unique to you. Before you can flirt successfully you need to begin with understanding yourself. Learning more about your own qualities and learning how to use them, flirting is essentially a skill of quiet confidence.

So what can you do to make sure others know you are a fantastic person? Primarily, flirting is something which is not conveyed through speech. The eyes are the window to the soul and they are also an excellent starting point for learning how to flirt. We’ve probably all experienced the situation when you’re sat in a room, disinterested with the goings on, and then someone catches your eye and you both hold it for a couple of seconds. What is it about you that caught and held someone’s attention, even if only momentarily? There are many different levels at which you can convey your interest, just by the different types of look you give. Flirting can incorporate many different types of gaze. Once of the most potent flirting techniques is to catch a stranger’s eye, hold it for a few seconds, break and then make eye contact once again. This say “Hey, I want to flirt”, and you then need to interpret their reaction to see if they want to reciprocate. The next level of flirting is to give them a specific look which says “I’m having naughty thoughts about you!” Sometimes this is done with a lingering gaze, sometimes with an up-and-down-the-body glance and sometimes with a stare, which suggests that you are hungry and looking to devour them.

Eye contact is obviously crucial, but should be used along with other kinds of body language. Positioning your body in such a manner that shows you are open to communication is crucial to the art of flirting. Learn how to adapt your body language to the signals they give you and you will quickly become an expert in the art of flirting. Develop these skills, and your self-esteem will increase too, making flirting enjoyable and nothing to be scared of.

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Cats’ Body Language

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Just as the body language of human beings can convey their emotions and thinking, similarly you can know your cat’s thinking by observing its body language. Observing your cat is essential to keep it healthy, for giving it meals, and for its toilet habits since it cannot speak and convey to you as to what it wants by words.

When you observe her body language, its ears and tail say a lot. She speaks mostly through these two mediums. If you notice your cat is displaying unusual body language which you are not able to study, it is advisable to take it to a vet for in such cases, the reason is mostly medical.

Upon hearing some unusual sounds, cats’ ears stand erect as they are very sensitive to sounds and slight movements around them. You can read the hot temper when your cat is about to fight if it sits with its head lowered, staring down its nose, staring at some other cat or dog. This is an alarming sign and tells you that it is about to attack something. In case if the tail is puffed, it is also a sign of anger and an indication of its attacking mode.

You can know if your cat is happy if it plays with its own tails or some objects around it. Its tail stands erect if it is happy. It will hop here and there; rub her body with yours or other objects. You will notice her happy body language especially some time after the meal. It feels relaxed and satisfied and is in the right playful mood.

Sad mood of your cat can be known if its tail is drooped. It is also a sign of bad health condition and you need to take it to the vet immediately.

The better you become in studying the body language of your cat, the more expert cat owner will you become. You can find some cat body language pictures on the internet or in magazines which can help you to learn a lot on the various signs of the body language of your cat.

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How To Master Your Body Language And Seduce Men Easier

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While all of us practice a certain form of body language unwillingly and unconsciously, there is quite a big step from regular to expert body language. You can never hear enough body language tips because, for any woman, pose, gestures and posture are essential in the dating game and in life, in general. The subtleties of body language can help you attract the right guy to a higher extent than any form of talking.


Eye contact


The human body has a central point for focusing actions and intentions – the eyes. In modern society, eye contact is of utmost importance, so many body language tips focus on getting this right. Sidelong glances are a great start for eye contact. A direct look can follow. At this point, the guy you are looking at will probably look back.


Instantly lower your eyes and put on an embarrassed smile – you were looking at him and he caught you doing it. You can take this body language / eye contact tip even further and after a few moments look at him again and this time hold your eyes on him for a few seconds. You can also use eye contact to avoid a guy you don’t like simply look at the opposite direction when he attempts to make eye contact.


First impression


Never overlook this important body language top tip your first impression is essential if you want to attract positive attraction. Whenever you are out and ready to meet a guy, make sure to look your best. If you are not happy with what you see in the mirror before you exit your house, don’t even go out! Your pose, your posture, your dress, the way your hair looks they should all be at the maximum level.


This first impression body language tip also refers to the level of confidence you express through the way you walk, the way you look and talk to people and the way you dominate the room you are in.


Body language tips regarding your hands


The way you hold and move your hands is also a good way to express your intentions. Here are a few interesting body language tips regarding the use of your hands and hand positions in a social encounter:


- Unclenched hands show openness.


- Playing with your hair or caressing the chair or other objects is a definite sign of interest, an almost sensual act.

- Try picking some fluff of his jacket (even if there is none!)


- Accidentally touch his hands when reaching for something.


- Briefly touch him during conversation to make a point or to laugh at a funny remark. This is a very direct and powerful body language gesture

Posture body language tips


The importance of body posture is essential when dating. You can show interest by facing the guy directly and by slightly leaning forward every now and then. Another great tip that outlines the importance of posture concerns the way you keep your back and shoulders.


A straight back with shoulders slightly brought backwards will expose your chest and is a definite sign of interest. Among other interesting posture and body language tips you might also consider crossing and uncrossing your legs during conversation. Movement of the human body as a form of expression


Since the bodylanguage tips mentioned above refer mainly to pose and posture, you should also consider other subtle body language activities. Facial expressions are among the most suggestive unspoken signals you can give to a guy – although we will detail these in a separate article. Your clothing and general visual appearance are also part of your body language mechanism, so pay special attention to them as well.


The human body can emit dozens of signals unconsciously, but if you learn to master your own body language signals and understand the signals transmitted by guys, you will soon be queen of the dating game.

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Create chemistry with sexy body language

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Certain forms of attraction can have a powerful influence on the opposite sex. Attractive body language is picked up by people on a very deep level of the mind. Experts say body language can account for as much as sixty percent of communication between individuals. Used correctly, it can make someone feel a sense of warmth and familiarity towards you.

We all know how important it is to make a good first impression. When someone meets you for the first time, there are a number of signs they will pick up displayed by your body language. One of these is posture. If you stand up straight with your head held high and your shoulders pushed back, it displays a sense of confidence in yourself. A great smile is also a sign that you are a warm and approachable individual. Making eye contact means you are not afraid of someone and you are eager to get to know them.

A man needs to carry himself as if he is strong and in charge to impress a woman. A woman won’t be interested in a weak and frail man. A woman needs to carry herself in a way which is confident and sexy, commanding a mans respect. No matter what physique you have, the correct body language will portray you as a sexy, confident and attractive person to the opposite sex. This will obviously greatly improve you chance of getting dates and repeat dates.

Body language can be exploited in many ways to attract the opposite sex. A great technique to learn is mirroring. Mirroring is done when you are interacting with someone by watching their movements, waiting a while, and then copying their movements. Be careful not to make it too obvious though. The person you are mirroring will start feeling a sense of closeness and comfort towards you without even realising it. This technique can be employed very successfully in many different situations like watching a movie or having coffee with someone.

It is important to notice your prospective partners body language carefully. After a while, you will learn how to pick up certain signals and respond to them correctly. When a woman plays with her hair or licks her lips, it often means she is in a playful mood and shows some interest in advancing to a physical level with a man. Another sign is when her eyes become soft and she loses concentration. A man will often become touchy and forget what he was saying. His eyes will also become dilated and he may become sweaty and agitated.

All through school, we are never taught the importance of body language in communication. This is a sad fact, because it is a very important part of communication in all human and animal life on Earth. Once you begin to master the correct use of body language, your ability to communicate successfully will increase dramatically. You will be on a whole new level socially.

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Understanding Body Language On A First Date

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People communicate through nonverbal cues more often than through verbal cues. It’s just that we don’t know that we are doing so.

This is the reason why experts agree that one of the keys to maintaining good communication with other people is to learn how to understand the nonverbal cues that they emit. For instance, when dating, there are body language cues that say whether a person is interested or not.

Here are some dating body language that you should learn to read the next time you went out on a date.

Going to your direction

Just as a person who is interested will directly go to a person, their dating body language will also point in the direction of the person they are interested in. People will lean towards you or point in your direction, whether it be with the foot, the leg or the whole body. People who are really into you will also exhibit a body language that is relaxed exhibiting trust and at the same time with tension.

Looking at the face

When dating for the first time, people whose interests were aroused will exhibit a common set of body language. Their eyebrows will rise, their eyes will dilate and their lips will part after smiling. One of the classic dating body language is the hair toss, where she will touch her hair and then look at you. With women, they will usually smile a lot and even giggle a couple of times at things that you say. Another dating body language that you should watch out for is the willingness to expose her wrists, palms and the inside of their arms.

Looking straight in the eye

Though not all people have the courage to exhibit this particular dating body language, it is nevertheless effective. People who look at you straight in the eye during conversations are found to be more attractive and more approachable. They are also considered to be more honest. People who make the effort to look at you in the eye are genuinely interested in you and in what you are saying. Otherwise they wouldn’t waste much time. One should remember though that this is not true for all kinds of people. Some people actually become shyer when talking to a person they really like. Their dating body language become more closeted and nervous. They would refuse to look directly at the eye and may bow down their heads all the time. Know the difference.

Sitting with arms crossed

This dating body language spells “don’t come closer” in big bold silent letters. A very protective stance, crossing the arms shows a need for people to back away because there is a problem with trust. This is one body language that tells you that you just made the worst impression on someone. Some people who are not into relationships unconsciously adopt this dating body language to show that they are not interested.

Batting their eyelash

This dating body language and flirting style may seem a bit archaic to you, having been there during the time of Scarlett O’ Hara but it sure is effective with the men. Only the women, however, can get away with this particular brand of dating body language. Men who try to bat their eyelash would probably appear as if they have a tic in their eyes and might need a psychiatrist.

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The body language target points

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The body language target points

By: http://www.bodylanguagecards.com

Body language is a form of non-verbal communication involving the use of stylized gestures, postures, and physiologic signs which act as cues to other people. Humans, sometimes unconsciously, send and receive non-verbal signals all the time.

The body language target points is a concept referring to wheel-like vortices which, according to traditional medicine, are believed to exist in the surface of the etheric double of man.

The body language target points are very similar to the identified Chakras as used in Yoga. In Yoga the Chakras are said to be “force centers” or areas where energy permeates from.   They are points on the physical body, the layers of the subtle bodies in an ever-increasing fan-shaped formation (the fans make the shape of a love heart).

According to Yoga, the Chakras are centers of energy, located on the midline of the body. There are seven of them, and they govern our psychological properties. The Chakras located on the lower part of our body are our instinctual side, the highest ones, our mental side.

The Chakras can have various levels of activity. When they’re “open,” they’re considered operative in a normal fashion.

If you think about it, each one of the Chakras and one of the main body gestures relate to one of the body language target points and ideally contribute to our being. Our senses would work together with our feelings and thinking, anytime there is a gag between what we think, feel or say, the body language sends a signal to us and to the environment.  For example, one of the most basic and powerful body-language signals is when a person crosses his or her arms across the chest. This can indicate that a person is putting up an unconscious barrier between themselves and others. If you try to understand the meaning of this gesture you will we see it is a gesture that is indicating we are protecting our chest against a possible attack, just like in animal behavior.

1 – The Basic Body Language Target Points

The Basic Body Language Target Points are associated with the color red. Like the base Chakra, it is the grounding force that allows us to connect to the earth’s energies and empower our beings and about being physically there and feeling at home in situations.

If it is open, you feel grounded, stable and secure. You don’t unnecessarily distrust people. You feel present in the here and now and are connected to your physical body. You feel you have sufficient territory.

If you tend to be fearful or nervous, your Root Chakra is probably under-active. You’d easily feel unwelcome.

If this BLTP/Chakra is over-active, you may be very materialistic and greedy. You’re probably obsessed with being secure and resist change.

Some gestures that relate to the Base Body Language Target Points:

2 – The Sacral Body Language Target Point

The Sacral Body Language Target Point is associated with the color orange or red-orange. The Sacral BLTP/Chakra is about feeling and sexuality. When it is open, your feelings flow freely, and are expressed without you being over-emotional. You are open to intimacy and you can be passionate and lively.

If you tend to be stiff, unemotional or have a “poker face,” the Sacral Chakra is under-active. You aren’t very open to people.

If this Chakra is over-active, you tend to be emotional all the time. You’ll feel emotionally attached to people and you can be very sexual in activity.

Some gestures that relate to the Sacral Body Language Target Point

3 – The Navel Body Language Target Point

The Navel Body Language Target Point is associated with the color yellow. The Navel BLTP/Chakra is about asserting yourself in a group. When it is open, you feel in control and you have sufficient self respect.

When the Navel BLTP/Chakra is under-active, you tend to be passive and indecisive. You’re probably timid and don’t get what you want and your body language will improve that, but if is over-active, you are domineering and probably even aggressive.

Some Gestures that relate to the Navel Body Language Target Point

4 –  The Heart Body Language Target Point

The heart Body Language Target Point is associated with the color Green. Green symbolizes harmony, creativity, health, abundance and nature. In the oriental cultures it is the combining of yellow (soul) and blue (spirit). Green, nature’s color, offers new energy and revitalizes tired nerves.

Located near the center of the breastbone or sternum, this point represents higher consciousness and love. As a Chakra the heart Chakra acts as the balance point for all the Chakras. It governs our relationships and how we interact with other people. A balanced heart Chakra is expressed in acceptance of self and others, personal values and ethics, following one’s unique direction in life.

Some Gestures that relate to the Heart Body Language Target Point

5 – The Throat Body Language Target Point

The Throat Body Language Target Point is associated with the color blue.

The throat point allows us to communicate our thoughts and feelings. It is directly connected to the ability to express inner creativity.

Touching the neck is example of the Throat target point, this gestures is about protecting the main artery.

This point is most interesting; all the gestures that relate to this point are almost cross cultures as see even in animals’ behavior. A lot of times animals make their attacks against their enemies by attacking the enemy in the throat.

Some Gestures that relate to the Throat Body Language Target Point

6 – The Mouth Body Language Target Point

The impact you make on others depends on what you say (7%), how you say it (38%), and by your body language (55%).

The vocal part: pitch, speed, volume, tone of voice is 38%. so the Mouth Body Language Target Point plays a major role in the in verbal communication.

The mouth is involved in the expression of many different emotions, from happiness to sadness, from fear to disgust. In emotions, the lips play a major role in creating visible shapes, with able backup from the teeth and tongue.

We usually breathe through the nose, but when we need more oxygen we use the mouth to gulp in greater amounts of air.

The mouth sends additional signals when it is speaking. If the mouth moves little, perhaps including incoherent mumbling, this may indicate an unwillingness to speak, for example from shyness or from a fear of betraying themselves.

A mouth that moves a lot during speech can indicate excitement or dominance as it sends clear signals that ‘I am speaking, do not interrupt!’

The mouth is also used for eating, and the way people eat can tell things about them.

A person who is lying to you will avoid making eye contact and his hands will try to cover his mouth.

Based on Yoga this point doesn’t feature in the ‘Ancient Indian 7 Chakra System’. In accordance with the ‘Egyptian 13 Chakra System’.

Some gestures that relate to the Throat Body Language Target Point

7 – The Eyes Body Language Target Point

The Eyes & Third Eye Body Language Target Point is associated with the color Blue. The Eyes point is about insight and visualization. When it is open, you have good intuition. You may tend to fantasize.

“The eye sees only what the mind is prepared to comprehend.”

- Henri Bergson

If it is under-active, you’re not very good at thinking for yourself, and you may tend to rely on authorities. You may be rigid in your thinking, relying on beliefs too much. You might even get confused easily.

The eyes communicate more than any other part of the human anatomy. Maintained eye contact can show if a person is trustworthy, sincere or caring. Shifty eyes, too much blinking can suggest deception. People with eye movements that are relaxed and comfortable yet attentive to the person they are conversing with are seen as more sincere and honest.

Some gestures that relate to the Throat Body Language Target Point

7 – The Crown Body Language Target Point

The Crown Body Language target Point is located at the very top of the head and associated with the color Violet. This point is identified by Yoga as the ‘Crown’ or “Thousand-Petaled Lotus”.  When it is open; you are unprejudiced and quite aware of the world and yourself. This point is about wisdom and being one with the world.

If it is under-active, you’re not very aware of spirituality. You’re probably quite rigid in your thinking.

If this Chakra is over-active, you are probably intellectualizing things too much. You may be addicted to spirituality and are probably ignoring your bodily needs.

Some gestures that relate to the Throat Body Language Target Point

You can learn more in our website: http://www.bodylanguagecards.com

References

1. Body language cards:http://www.bodylanguagecards.com

2. Tarnow, E. (2005)

3. Three elements of communication – and the so called “7%-38%-55% Rule” – Ecademy

4. Tarnow, E. (2005)

5. Abbasi, A.R.(2007)

6. Abbasi, A.R.(2007) Towards Knowledge-Based Affective Interaction-Situational Interpretation of Affect, Abdul Rehman Abbasi, Takeaki Uno, Matthew N.Dailey, Nitin V. Afzulpurkar, Proceedings of 2nd International Conference on Affective Computing and Intelligent Interaction, Lisbon, Portugal 12-14 Sep, 2007, Lecture Notes in Computer Science Vol. 4738, pp.455–466, Springer-Verlag,2007.

7. Argyle, M. (1990). Bodily communication (2nd edition). New York: International Universities Press. ISBN 0823605515

8. Cohen, David. Body Language, What you need to know, 2007.

9. Grammer K. 1990. Strangers meet: laughter and nonverbal signs of interest in opposite sex encounters. Journal of Nonverbal Behavior 14: 209-236.

10. Hall, E.T. Silent Language. Doubleday & Co, New York, 1959.

11. Henley, N. M. Body Politics: Power, Sex and Non-Verbal communications. Prentice-Hall, 1977.

12. For the uses of the word in P?li literature, see Thomas William Rhys Davids, William Stede, Pali-English dictionary. Reprint by Motilal Banarsidass Publ., 1993, page 558: [1]

13. Denise Lardner Carmody, John Carmody, Serene Compassion. Oxford University Press US, 1996, page 68.

14. Stuart Ray Sarbacker, Samadhi: The Numinous and Cessative in Indo-Tibetan Yoga. SUNY Press, 2005, pages 1-2.

15. “Yoga has five principal meanings: 1) yoga as a disciplined method for attaining a goal; 2) yoga as techniques of controlling the body and the mind; 3) yoga as a name of one of the schools or systems of philosophy (dar?ana); 4) yoga in connection with other words, such as hatha-, mantra-, and laya-, referring to traditions specialising in particular techniques of yoga; 5) yoga as the goal of yoga practice.” Jacobsen, p. 4.

Trained as a zoologist, Gill became fascinated by the similarities of basic mammalian behaviors to those of humans. He has spent the last 18 years investigating this field and as a lecturer on non-verbal communication, presentation and public speaking.
He is a personal trainer to some leading corporate negotiators and politicians.
Gill shares his professional secrets of his trade in this unique tool to master the secrets of Body Language.

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Productivity as Seen Through Your Body Language

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Body Language experts, and out mothers, have long told us that there are some basic things that people should know and do. Gentlemen shake hands when they meet and crossing your arms across your chest is a defensive posture.

Since our body speaks for us, in the eyes of others, it is important that a leader walks as he talks. This list of body language and posture are simple things that you can do to give the impression of being a confident leader and the impression can be everything in establishing a good sense of office productivity.

As you read through this list of how to give a good impression, remember that this holds true in the Anglo-Saxon world. A simple example is that making eye contact in some countries is offensive and a man making eye contact with a woman in some countries can be dangerous.

Having given that warning, make eye contact. Always look directly at the person you are speaking to, especially if they are speaking. The experts will tell you that the direction you move your eyes tells how your mind is working. Looking directly into the eyes of the speaker simply shows that you are interested in the conversation. This will also give you a sense of confidence.

Face the person you’re talking to. After eye contact this shows you are interested in what is being said and that you are fully engaged in the conversation. A person sitting down with their back half turned and looking over their shoulder can answer a yes or no question. This type posture if a conversation is a clear sign that “I want to get away!”

Always smile. A smile is contagious and this has been tested to be true. When standing in line, look at the person next to you, smile and make a brief eye contact. The person will smile back. Always having a smile in the office will make others feel positive, and even safe, when you’re around.

How may times has it been said in an office to avoid someone because they look like they are having a bad day. Avoiding people simply means dropping productivity. Period.

Shake hands appropriately. Shaking hands can be considered a reflection of the person you are shaking hands with. A man does not want to crush a woman’s hand and no one wants to come across as either unsure or overbearing. Practice a handshake that is as firm as the persons whose hand you are shaking. Also, don’t hold on too long, it annoys some people.

Stand tall. Short or tall, man or woman, stand to your full height. This may sound a bit like the military but you keep your shoulders back and stomach in. When you stand at your full height you will have an air of confidence.

Stand with your hands lightly held together behind your back. This has the double benefit of helping you stand tall and it is seen as an open position that is not intimidating. As stated above crossing arms across the chest is defensive.

It is also a good walking habit to have your hands behind the back if you are one of those the lean too far forward while walking. Keep your head up and take even strides. Walk confidently.

If you just can’t keep your hands behind your back, then put your hands in your pockets.

But…

Take your hands out of your pockets it can be seen as a sign that you have something to hide. If you just don’t know what to do with your hands, there are alternatives. Always carry a notepad and pen with you. A notepad can be useful to take notes, but it is great in keeping your hands out of your pockets and from crossing your arms across your chest.

Sit up straight and if you are in a meeting you should be leaning slightly forward. Productive people are leaning forward ready to jump in and do something. The people that are leaning back have other things on their mind.

Leaning back means you can’t imagine why someone would have called this meeting at 7 in the evening on a Friday, and leaning in means you are ready to get things done.

Worst of all, slouching, makes you look disinterested and can give off an impression of laziness, but since you are standing tall, sitting tall should only be natural.

In the eyes of others our body speaks for us before the first word leaves our lips. A person assumed to naturally be the leader of a team is not always the leader, but usually the person that naturally gives that impression. Attention to your body language and posture are simple things that can give others the impression that you are confident leader to be trusted and trust can be vital in establishing a good sense of office productivity.

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Cindy King
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Over 25 years field experience in aligning cultural offers for international sales.


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